OK, yes, I’ve succumbed to the social media craze, and have joined Facebook, YouTube, and LinkedIn.  Yet with each passing day, I’m realizing that not only are most of these digital playgrounds a colossal waste of time, they really seem to be warping everyone’s social skills. I’m not completely slamming the latest technology here. And it’s not because I can’t, or won’t embrace social change. In fact, I think these platforms can be useful and entertaining when used correctly. My problem is that many of these “networking” applications have started to diminish our actual face-to-face interaction. For example, I recently attended a “real” live networking event, and in one hour, I heard the line, “Oh yeah, I saw that on Facebook” uttered in four different conversations.  When a conversation is interrupted by “I saw it on Facebook” it’s like bursting someone’s balloon. I saw disappointment in the eyes of 3 out of the 4 people who were the recipient of that line. They were excited to verbalize a story they felt was topical or interesting, and someone squashed their enthusiasm. It was sad. Doesn’t anyone remember how exciting good conversation can be? When we’re engaged personally, especially one-on-one, it’s different than sharing back and forth on line. In person you might be wowed by a story-tellers eloquence or vivaciousness. True, you may be bored to death, too, but there is simply no electronic replacement for looking one another in the eye and sharing. I find people interesting. I like to ask questions and learn about where they’ve been, what they’ve done, their successes, and failures, etc. You get to see that spark appear when you find a topic they’re really passionate about. I’m not really sure who’s at fault for our growing disconnectedness. Is it the people who put EVERYTHING on social media including when they’re going to bed? Or is it the people who use it to find out what’s going on with their friends and family, rather than actually talking to them? It’s a double edged sword, and one I’m not finding easy to swallow. Stay connected on a personal, more intimate level. Your friends and family will appreciate it, and you’ll get to know your business partners, vendors, and your customers a little better. At the end of the day, personal connections will serve everyone better.  Even better than a tweet or a status update.

‍Chris Hoffman

ViaMark | Asheville,  NC